King of My Mind
It’s no secret that the past two years have been hard, and part of the difficulty of it all has been navigating the various opinions. It’s been a hard space for me as I wrestle through the shifting nature of the world. As new restrictions came about, I found myself not sharing the same perspectives that those around me had. For some, I was way too strict in my approach, and for others, I wasn’t strict enough. The longer we lived in COVID, the more that I dug into my own views. Over time I started to notice that I had less empathy for the other “side” and was beginning to form a caricature of the other.
I would say things to myself like, "How could you hold such a view? Why would you feel that way?”
I realized that pride and self-superiority were beginning to mar my character – it wasn’t just that I thought I knew better, I was beginning to believe that I was better.
And that is not the way of Jesus.
I had to do what Jesus calls us to – repent or change direction. I had to stop and say, “Jesus, I’m off track. My pride has gotten control over me. This is not what you’re like. Please forgive me.” I’d like to say that I’ve only wrestled with pride and superiority through the pandemic, but the truth is that it’s something I’ve identified and brought to Jesus before in the past and something I will likely have to bring to him again.
As I allow Jesus to be King of my mind, he walks in kindness with me - forgiving me and patiently calling me to himself more and more. He shares his humility with me and teaches me to love the other as myself.